Chapter 14 : 𝐇𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐄𝐯𝐢𝐥

𝙎𝙝𝙞𝙫

It was morning and I was ready to leave. I headed downstairs and grabbed my car keys from the table by the front door. I locked the door before moving to the parking lot, pulling the car to the main Street, in front of Shanaya's house.

Yet, I didn't leave.

I waited for the little disaster to come out of her house. I knew her, she'll do anything but won't share the same car with me today, and I wouldn't let that happen. The only thing we had in common was our stubbornness.

I waited for fifteen more minutes, tapping my fingers at the steering. My other arm rested casually on the open window frame, until she finally showed up.

I watched her waving goodbye to her mom before she closed the door behind her.

Her brunette hair was down today, spilling over her shoulders like a silk curtain. She pressed them straight but little did she know? I liked her natural, short curls.

She had on dark blue shorts and a white shirt, knotted at the waist, emphasizing her waistline. Her shirt was buttoned down till her cleavage appeared.

It was just her casual wear.

She didn't even spare my car a glance, continuing her walk toward the street. Perfectly avoiding my existence.

That was the moment I started the engine. I dropped the speed, enough to match her pace.

I stopped the car beside her, glared in her direction, while she pointedly ignored me and continued to walk away.

Expected.

I started the car, just to stop it next to her once again.

"Get in the car, Shanaya." I said to her through the window, my voice tight.

Her gaze was laced with anger as she finally stared at me.

"I can't believe you have the audacity to talk to me right now." She said in a mean tone before moving further, not even caring to get a reply.

My blood raced, a familiar irritation filling in my nerves. This time, I was angry at myself.

What have I done?

I sighed. I knew how to handle her attitude.

I stepped out of the car and shut the door behind me before walking straight toward her. I stopped right in front of her, deliberately blocking her path. She startled slightly at the sudden movement, her body flinching as she looked up at me with widened eyes, clearly caught off guard by how close I was standing.

For a second, neither of us said anything. The air between us felt strangely tense, heavy with unspoken words.

"Get in the car." I ordered.

She raised her eyebrows at my command.

"Fuck off."

My jaw tightened at her rough words. I took a dangerous step towards her, our eyes locking with mutual anger.

"Dare to disrespect me again and I'll..."

She titled her head, brows raised, showing a fake approval for my words.

"Else what will you do?" She asked.

I clenched my fist to calm myself before I swooped down, caught her behind the knees, and swung her entire weight over my shoulder.

"Hey!" She screamed.

She was too light to lift and still acts like a boss lady, no wonder anyone could kidnap her.

"What the hell? Put me down!"

I carried her back to the car while holding her on my shoulder with only one hand.

She immediately started hitting my back with her fists and kicking her legs wildly in protest, nearly landing one directly against my balls, gladly she missed. I tightened my grip on her legs, holding her entire weight securely over my shoulder despite how much she struggled.

Another kick barely missing me as her hair fell messily over her face.

I let out an annoyed breath, adjusting her higher on my shoulder. No wonder I was impressed by her strength as she tried to get herself free, but still she was too weak to do it, at least in front of me.

"Leave me!"

When I reached the car, I opened the door of the passenger side with my free hand. Then I shifted her weight to my arms and carefully lowered her into the car seat.

She struggled against me, attempting to leave the car while I blocked her exit. Despite my efforts to keep her seated, she actively resisted, trying repeatedly to move past me and out of the vehicle, that's when I pushed her back at the seat by placing my arm below her neck.

Our faces inches apart as I gave her the death stare.

"Don't. Move." I warned.

Surprisingly, she stopped moving, staring directly into my eyes. I couldn't tell clearly if it was fear, shock or something else.

But good.

I fastened her seat belt. My forearm rested against the space between her neck and chest, restrained enough to avoid touching anywhere inappropriate, but tight enough to create a subtle pressure that held her in place.

She froze beneath me, her breathing faltering slightly as the click of the seat belt echoed inside the quiet car.

I looked at her once again, she was still staring at me, her angry expressions were changed into something else.

Releasing my hold, I stretched to my full height and shut her door. She was lost in deep thought as I made my way towards the driver's side. When she finally broke the imagination I caught her untying her seat belt but I managed to sit on my seat and locked the car on the time.

Just when I pulled the lock, she tried to push open the door.

"Open it." She said to me, growing frustrated.

"I need to talk." I told her, sitting calmly in my seat.

"Why would I talk to you? You don't even believe me." Her loud, high-pitched voice echoed within the small space of the car.

I exhaled.

Stay calm, Shiv. You can do it.

"I'm sorry, Shanaya." I said, closing my eyes as I never thought I would say these words to her.

She readjust herself at the seat.

"Seriously?" She taunted. "You didn't even listen to me yesterday."

I glanced at her, hoping she could see the guilt in my eyes.

"I am doing it now." I said, my voice calm.

"That's not how it works." She shrugged her shoulders angrily. "Open the door, Shiv."

"No. I'm not opening the door." My pitch raised a bit, I was trying hard not to do it.

"Do it!"

"Shut up, Shanaya-"

"Do it. What is wrong with you?" She screamed.

"Shut up-"

"Let go of me! Why are you even doing this?"

"Okay, fuck! I care." I growled, my loud voice finally making her silent.

My blood raced, I took a heavy breath, and everything went silent. She just stared at me, her eyes locked with mine, unable to believe my words.

"I do care about you, Shanaya, and I hate myself for that." I continued, my words filling the silent space. "I don't know how to show it, because if I will, you'll fall in love with me and I don't want that."

In the perfect silence, only the sound of our breaths remained. We kept an awkward eye contact for a few minutes, unable to speak anything. I could see the hope in her eyes after she heard my words.

If I raised my voice again, I knew she would cry, and I refused to be the cause of that pain, not after the last time.

When Shanaya finally gathered the words, she spoke.

"I know you care, and I'm already in love." Her voice surprisingly soft compared to my harsh tone.

"We both know that's not love, it's just your obstinacy." I argued.

She fixed herself on the seat to face me clearly, "It's not. Whatever I feel about you is real, Shiv. You have no idea but I do love..."

Her voice dropped without completing the sentence. A feeling I couldn't name twisted my heart. It almost felt like a physical pain.

She tried to avoid eye contact after her last words.

"Nevermind." She mumbled.

My eyes stayed on her face, hope flicker back to life, only for me to decide instantly that I couldn't live this way again. I wanted it over.

"Get over me, Shanaya. I am not good for you. I'm not good for anyone." I said, holding the steering tightly with one hand. "You deserve someone better than me, who knows how to handle you, who knows what you like, what you want and everything."

"You do know me, and you know how to handle me." She argued.

"No, I don't." I argued back.

"Yes, you do. How do you know what my favourite drink is? How do you know I need you the most when I tell you to go away? Nobody knows me more than you and I know it pretty well that you can handle me. And you're the one I deserve."

I opened my mouth to speak but her words overwhelmed me. We shared a mutual, understanding eye contact.

Both of us, full of hope.

"I'll hurt you, Shanaya."

"You already hurt me."

"I know, and it hurts me too." My voice turned deep as I confessed, "I don't want to hurt you."

"Then Don't. Be with me." She finally said.

My muscles calmed. I wanted to leave everything and run to her. Over the years, I didn't even realise how much I was distant from her that it wasn't my desire anymore.

But still, I would be with her, only if she'll do one thing for me.

Only one.

"Can you change yourself for me? Can you stop bullying people for my sake? Just because I don't need you to do all these?" I asked.

"It is who I am! How am I supposed to change that?" She replied, her voice held a sharp edge of irritation.

"It's not you. You know you do all these things to impress people who don't give a damn about you."

Her jaw dropped. She couldn't bear the truth this time.

"You threw her in the fucking pool, she didn't even know how to swim." I raised my voice a little, once again, after remembering what she did with Ruhi.

"Stop it." She squeezed her eyes shut and showed me her palm. "I don't want to talk about her."

"It's not about her, if it was someone else I would have helped them too. I don't want you to do this to anyone." The words tumbled out of me, a flood of pent-up anger and correction.

She clenched her fists, I knew she was so angry she could punch me on my nose, and I would gladly take it without complaint.

She glanced out of the window, still not answering the questions I asked.

"Tell me!" I raised my voice to get her attention back.

"Tell you what?" She faced me again, her tone matching the intensity of my voice.

"That you'll change for me."

I searched her eyes, hoping this time she would choose me. This was the last time I was trying. If she would say yes, I would never let her go.

I got a glimpse of my childhood, when I asked her the same thing and all she said was she won't change her personality for me. It should be me to accept her like that.

The little boy's world crumbled when he realized he wasn't her choice. The first and last time he cried for her. He kept trying until he was finally over her.

How could she say she loved me when she couldn't say it clearly?

How could she say she loved me when she couldn't change herself for me? Yet, here I was - a man who would watch the world burn if it turned against him - ready and willing to change for her.

I kept waiting for her to speak again, but she never did. She finally let go of my gaze, staring out of the window.

I felt a painful connection to my childhood self, the boy who first broke after that same refusal. My heart broke again.

And this time, I evict you out of my heart, Shanaya.

"What happened yesterday?" I asked, coming back to the topic.

"Why should I tell you if you don't trust me." She said.

"I trust you. I need to know what happened." I asked again.

She doesn't speak for a few seconds. I watched her eyes watered again. I blamed myself for this.

Doesn't matter how hard I try, I always end up hurting her.

"He was trying to..." She closed her eyes as she remembered the things that happened yesterday. ".. touch me. He put his hand on my shoulder and..." her eyes opened, covered with more tears.

"It's okay, stay calm. I'm listening." I consoled.

"He called me sexy. And he asked me to sleep with him." She completed.

The heartbreak vanished, replaced by a surge of pure rage. My blood boiled at the nerve of him to say such a thing.

I trusted him.

I was right, I didn't have the courage to believe he could do something like that. I didn't care if he was my friend but I would definitely not accept this kind of behavior with anyone.

"You rarely make genuine friends and when you do, you trust them blindly, ignoring all their imperfections." She said. "Stop making people use you for their benefit."

My gaze stayed fixed on the steering as if I was searching for answers written there. My head suddenly gone blank, the silence settled in.

"I'll make sure this won't happen again." I assured her, not knowing what else to say.

"Whatever." She tried to open the door again, "If you're done, let go of me now."

Here we go again.

"You're coming with me so shut up." I snapped back.

"Why don't you invite that girl you dropped yesterday instead?"

Of course, I was waiting for this.

"I will. Before that you need to say sorry to her."

She faked a breathy laugh, "I will never do that."

"You have to." I warned.

"Over my rich, hot, dead body."

My jaw clenched, "You will, Shanaya."

This only raised her anger.

"Unlock the car." She ordered.

"I won't."

That's it-

Her patience snapped when I didn't unlock the doors, she climbed halfway into my seat, intent on opening the lock herself. I grabbed her hand to stop her from pressing the button.

"Shanaya stop."

Instead of stopping, she launched herself on my seat, settling stubbornly on my lap. She fitted perfectly between my legs - though we were fighting.

As she kept trying to unlock the door I was trying to hold her hands. In just a matter of seconds I did it, locking her wrists with my one palm behind her back, preventing any movement.

She kept trying to get out of my hold and it was funny for me that she thought she could do it.

Her legs were positioned on either side of my body. I could feel her lower curves above my lap. Her chest barely touching mine and our faces were just a few inches apart.

That was the time I guess we both realized how intimating that position was. If we were not haters, it would be an electrifying moment.

Her expressions changed, She watched me intently. Her eyes noticed mine deeply before they moved to my lips.

She had stopped moving, not trying to get out of my hold anymore.

Her face was so close to mine, I intake her beauty too. Her captivating eyes, thick, dramatic eyelashes, flawless skin, soft as silk, the inviting curve of her lips...

My breath hitched.

Fuck!

She moved her hip curves just above my cock.

"I know you saw it last night, didn't you?"

Was it me being high or did her voice actually turn husky?

She bit her lower lip, a slow, sexy move. Almost compelling me for intoxication without any drink.

She kept rubbing her hips above my cock as she continued. "You know? Every night I think about us. I think how I will feel in your arms. How I might feel when you'll touch me. How I'll feel when you'll be inside me."

A low groan fell out of my throat and I regretted that I gave her what she wanted.

My grip at her hands loosened. She gave me her that devilish smile.

"Even the mere thought of us together feels incredible. I can only imagine how perfect the reality will be. What do you think, Shiv?"

My name came out of her mouth as a slow whisper, it was enough to make my heart launch into a frantic rhythm.

My mouth fell open, I wasn't able to get proper oxygen supply. She was killing me.

"Are you hard, baby?" She whispered in a husky voice, still moving her hips up and down at my - now grown - length.

My breathing quickened as she increased the speed.

"Shanaya..." I tried to stop her but I didn't know any other word except her name in that moment.

She came closer, our chest touching now. I could feel her breasts pressing on my chest and her pebbled nipples digging inside me. She lowered her mouth, leaning towards my lips. For a second I thought she would kiss me but she went lower, kissing the part of my neck instead, sending an unfamiliar shiver throughout my nerves.

I couldn't believe my eyes were falling shut from the unwanted pleasure I was having. My eyes rolled when she used her tongue to lick the sensitive area of my neck and continued to lick till the end of my jawline. My head fell back at the seat.

The feeling pulled an involuntary hiss from my throat, and I hated that she’d heard it.

She kept rubbing her abdomen above mine, I was close. If she won't stop, I will...

She placed her hand near my head on the seat, that was the moment I realized I freed her hands, I didn't even know when.

I snapped my eyes open, meeting hers. She was admiring the view, while I wasn't even able to breath steadily.

Her gaze fell on my lips again. She leaned slowly. I closed my eyes, unable to react.

The last rub of her hip and damn it, I couldn't take it anymore.

I grabbed her waist, halting her movements.

"Shanaya, stop." Finally the words came out.

Our lips didn't meet, stopping in the middle, almost an inch apart.

She stopped. Without any words, she got away from me. I gulped awkwardly, unable to open my eyes.

I could feel her staring at me. When I finally opened my eyes she smiled at me.

The smile that clearly said she won.

Yep, she did.

I didn't even know when she opened the door and moved out of my lap, leaving the car. I let out a breath I hadn't realized I was holding.

She closed the door and I closed my eyes because I needed to calm my racing heart and the ache in my pants because it wasn't not able to get the space inside it, thanks to its length.

Fuck, she knows. She knows how to handle me.

I thought I was going to handle her attitude but no, nobody could ever win from the little disaster. I watched her go away from the car with her waist curving left and right with each step.

Then she stopped. God knows what changed her mind when she turned around, coming towards the car once again.

My head remained pillowed against the seat, while I worked to slow my breathing to a normal rhythm.

She opened the door of the passenger side and settled down.

"Actually, I changed my mind. I forgive you." She said casually, taking something out of her bag. "I have makeup to do, drive slow."

She folded her legs above the seat and took the sight of my condition - which happened because of her. "Come on, we're getting late." She said like nothing happened just a minute ago.

I exhaled the last breath and focused on the steering, adjusting my jeans.

It was painful.

I gripped the steering wheel so tightly my knuckles turned white. With one last glance at her, I faced forward, concentrating on the road as I drove toward the college.

I really wanted to push her away but she had a type of charm that kept pulling me to her. Removing her from my life would never be easy.

I hated how easily she controlled me. I didn't even know she was the dominating one. I hated myself for everything.

Also, I hate you, little headache.